this is what i do sometimes

these are actual tweets from 50cent and nate robinson respectively (barely embellished w/ lolcat linguistics and capslock)

things that happened since the last post! !

sometimes i sell software on craigslist, but dont ask questions about it. this man named Joe wanted to buy some of this software. we chat back and forth via e-mail, negotiating the purchase. i say 'i can meet at 7'. he says 'WHY SO LATE?', almost like heath ledger (rip bro) as the joker. a bit astonished, i still reply 'because that's when i get back from work, would another day work for you?'. there's no response, so i get home and start cooking some food.

then i get a phone call. i let it go to voicemail because my shit is boiling. another call immediately ensues, so i pick up and hear a gruff, cranky old-man voice: 'HEY SEAN , IT'S JOE. I'M OUTSIDE'. this was bewildering because i hadn't expected him; he didn't confirm that he was coming for sure. convo is as follows:

me- 'Ok.., that's cool, but give me like 10 minutes to finish something up.'
old-man joe - 'WHAT? YOU INSIDE THE APARTMENT? COME DOWN AND LET ME IN.'
me- 'uhhhhhhhhh, just give me 10 minutes and I can deal with you, I'm in the middle of something, I wasn't expecting you.'
angry-man joe - 'I DROVE 55 FUCKING MILES AND YOU AREN'T GONNA LET ME IN? COM'ON. *grunt noise*'
me- 'not dealing with this shit. goodbye.'

then i proceed to get 5 calls each followed by a voicemail. i go about my night as usual, continuing to give no fuck. in the morning, i decide to hear what old-man joe had to say about our encounter. they all basically said, in a desperately pleading voice 'HEY man, I'm sorry, I'm calmed down , just let me in . I'm not gonna hurt ya! I need this . It's ok, come on. Lets do this'. he also left me an e-mail apologizing for his behavior.

despite all that, he seemed to be just a crotchety old man rather than a complete sociopath, so i made arrangements to meet him halfway between cinci and hamilton since i had an indoor soccer match anyway. we meet up, he has a truck , i hand him the software, he hands me a check and gives me an ambiguous stink-eye, i look confused, then we part ways.

in summary: craigslist is a random grab-bag of the strangest people you can meet, and that's not even including whatever happens in casual encounters (who knows what kinds of weird fucking goes on there). once, when selling software , this dude subtly txt-threatened my life after he couldn't figure out how to install Windows 7.

in other news, here's an extremely racist / homophobic / though-provoking photo on a condom machine in a gas station bathroom in no place other than central ohio. have a good week!

a bile of words

to jump right into the exciting mix: i'm having a half-assed facebook conversation with my good friend who is currently residing in peru. i say half-assed because the interface keeps cutting out, letting him only say something before he has 'disconnected', so since we are both asses, there is only one ass butting into the discussion. it's like a hit-and-run chat, a la : 'hey dude , what's up???? *immediately disconnects*' . life 2.0; the world isn't prepared for this.

it's about to hit 4:20pm and i have nary a day to smoke grass anyway. instead, i'm editing my japanese supervisor's grant proposal, which is a huge deals. tmyk (the more you know), english-speaking japanese people have a penchant for pluralizing words that aren't normally pluralized. add an 's' to your favorite catchphrase and you might have just started a new, racially-insensitive meme / phenomenon.

aaand here's some pics from the weekend:



tina weymouth of talking heads , now w/ tom-tom club . i could tell she was really old, but her personality / bass-dance reminded me of a cool, old aunt that still loves to Funk The Fuck Out.



this was in a bathroom of some lavish-type bar that i stumbled into. my friend said that the blue velvet room - unrelated to the david lynch movie , fortunately - in the back was reserved for the 'in-the-knows'. i tried to sneak in, but i ended up walking toward a mirror; i was inebriated to the point where i thought he (me) was welcoming me in, and i turned left toward a light, but the light was in the streets, outside of the bar.